Angkor Wat: an Empty, Hidden Treasure

Some depressing poetry to fit the mood of this beautiful, ancient place that was abandoned after Buddhists took power in Cambodia.

This bus window reminds me of Los Angeles, of dodging people dried out by drugs and the sun, drunk wanderings and eating Thai food. Arguments, lots of them, about things irrelevant, blowing through the air like beautiful dragonflies (ugly upon first glance), but blossoming into beauty, becoming nothing in a sky of love and hate and endless energy.

Did you come to say goodbye? Fire and water were never meant to balance, both selfish in their burns and drowns. Igniting the other, jealous of different strides and the qualities they wish they could both possess.

Distance and time have changed our minds, dreams and goals our spirits. I must be free, free, and you want security because you never had it. I let my flame down to lie, and watched your Grandmother die. I know you regret letting me in, and haven’t been right ever since, but how can love work when we both know that to trust is a sin?

I’m just speaking my mind, I’ve found the path of divine love that will never lead you astray. Once you love what makes you different, you’ll see that we’re all the same, and life is just a greedy game, darling it pains me to see you float away. No time or touch wasted, just growth for ourselves, addicted to each other, love our medicine instead of looking for help.

Lately I’ve been livin like I don’t care if I die, you say we’re too different, we manipulate with words like sweet cherry pie turned sour, too early or too late, always competing for who could have less on their plate, to feel empty inside to match how we’re feelin, if you compare us to others then life will have no meaning.

You say I don’t talk, but I’ll say I love you forever. Just hoping sanity and sanctions stay together, stronger for having known you, learning about my flaws and strengths. Your first true love, I wanted to love life like me, never wanted you to break. I can’t say if things will be better or worse, just know that I have always put you first. I’ll never forget holding your life’s strings in the hospital, playing with fate, for me it was always just love and hate, no one can do the same.

Sometimes I wish I could go back, before I knew the world was so big, now I see the truth and there is no time to waste on unhappy things.

 

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